Now this is going to be tricky.
Here I am 40 something. Married, kids, good job, nice roof over my head. I am very aware that there are a lot of people out there much less fortunate than me. My problem is that I am at the end of the book, so to speak. The rest of it, life I mean, doesn't usually warrant more than a postscript.
It's a matter of preparing the kids as best I can for their lives and then slipping into the background and let them get on with it. I am in the process of passing the baton. Trouble is I don't want to let go of the bloody baton.
It's all very well talking about raging against the dying of the light and growing old disgracefully but that is not as easy as I thought it was going to be. So this is a thank you to all of you out there who are making the whole process a little easier by making me laugh, providing a soundtrack and making me think that there is a lot more to discover about the world and the people in it.
Ladies and gentlemen.....the blogroll. Take a bow all of you.
*and to think this post was going to be a review of Casino Royale, well you can read that in the Sunday papers*
UPDATE Wyndham's review of Casino Royale is the only one you need to read.
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24 comments:
Ditto. Perhaps just a little further on the road than you (my kids having left home) but still hoping that there is going to be more to enjoy about life.
I took a bow and banged my head on the keyboard. Thanks a bunch.
Don't let go of the baton! Let the kids get their own bloody baton!
I initially wrote that as 'don't let go of the baron!', which has made me laugh so much I don't think I can continue...
Dave, I think it's time for you to get your 'grup' article out again.
That made me laugh paroxysmically too.
There's no hope for me today.
For those who wonder what Pat is talking about (I scratched my head for a minute, thank goodness I keep an archive in word, which i can search) she's referring to an atricle I wrote here.
Let them have their own baton and you go and have some fun when they're out of your hair. Now is the time you can make other contributions to life, the universe and everything, not just the DNA contribution. For gawd's sake don't end up like my dad - he is still trying to run my life for me (yesterday he was trying to run my career).
Realdoc, you nearly gave me heart failure - you are quite well aren't you - your light is not really dying is it?
If I gave them the baton they are likely to say 'whatevah' and throw it back at me so I am hanging on to it for now.
Annie no sign of impending doom quite yet. I am a doctor, we don't get sick, didn't you know.
Well, I am way beyond your years realdoc, and I rarely get sad. But I concur that several bloggers - you included - have brought a whole new batch of joy into my life on top of what was there already.
So ta very much y'all. One day I will try and repay the debts.
cello, if I'm one of the fortunate few, you've more than repaid any imagined debts, many times over...
And I should say that I've been somewhat uncharacteristically miserable of late, and all of you good bloggers and commenters have really cheered me up. So a big thank you from me as well.
Ahh, we appear to be drifting dangerously close to some kind of virtual group hug...quick, assume stiff upper lip!
Yeah. For the cheering up bit, which bloggers all do exceptinally well.
But forty-something - you're only halfway there woman!
That's 246 in dog years.
My tip would be setting up a buy-to-let baton which would generate a self-financing income when they rent it out to their friends.
Old-schmold! Get a grip woman. It concentrates the mind wonderfully (ok, I know that refers to being executed the next morning, but then as a doctor you know that life is sexually transmitted terminal disease) and you get to do the stuff you like, because anything you don't like is a waste of time. And anyway, this is a blog! you can be as old as you like! But the more disgraceful the better. Obviously.
Oh, by the way, in blog-land you don't have to be 40+. I'm not, whatever my real birthdate may be; here in this fantasy-land I can be the age my brain tells me I am.
So can you.
HA! It's a bugger isn't it?! And don't bother changing your man, all you end up with is another man. Life eh, and then you die, but as I think you yourself pointed out, very shortly we will all have forgotten what it is we're passing and to whom and why . . . woteva
My word..haven't you heard?
40 is the new 30
If kids today hang around until their late 20s then you're not quite ready for lawn bowling.
I quite liked the 40s...didn't miss losing half of my testosterone..and I still have an entire year left!
As for slipping into the background..HELLO!..just when it all starts coming together? Never.
My oldest is 21 and the youngest is 5 so I will probably be in the thick of it until my last breath.
Few things in Life are as rewarding as watching your DNA turn into successful adults who will carry your DNA further upstream.
It's all good..you can keep your baton and pass it on whenever you want..it is your baton..sort of.
Thank you all for your kind words. I think I was having a bit of a moment yesterday, much better today. The only thing is my self-pitying whining is now out there for posterity, I think this may call for a Sylvanian post to make up for it.
Oh realdoc, as other's have said, you're not old.
I understand the 'taking a moment' thing. I've done it recently as this is perhaps the last year that my oldest daughter will be living with us. Soon it's off to college and all that brings.
My heart hurts just thinking about it...but I know I must let go.
Speechless. If the kids are growing up, life is just beginning for you. Travel, further education, kulcha, creativity and more.
Mind you, I'm a fine one to talk because I haven't the faintest idea how to develop my life and I haven't even got any kiddies to blame. But we are only half way through and that certainly doesn't equal over.
RD your only as old as the man you feel ?
Do what I'm doing - grow old disgracefully! Mind you, I've got a good excuse - making up for all those years of doing what ex-husband wanted, not what I wanted. I went to my first heavy metal concert in umpteen years last night and guess what - there were metalheads older than me there! Just grab life by the balls and go for it. If your kids get embarrassed and go "tut-tut, mum, at your age ..." then you're doing a good job :)
Hmm, good points about growing older:
1. Only a few years away from the menopause. No more worries about pregnancy or horrible menstruation. Yippee!
2. People stop saying "so, what are you going to do with your life"?
3. You don't have to spend time in nightclubs or pubs. Why leave the comfort of your nice warm home on a Friday night?
Bad things about growing older:
1. Only a few years away from the menopause - osteoporosis, weight gain, general failing health.
2. I know this is very shallow, and of course I should recognise my "inner beauty", ahem, but it's a real drag knowing that I've joined the army of invisible women who'll never be seen as attractive again. It's even more of a drag having to learn to accept it.
3. Growing old with a certain amount of dignity in tact. Absolutely necessary, but boring and difficult.
Betty, I feel your pain especially numbers 2 and 3 of the 'cons'.
I'm 40-something too, but haven't hit that particular bump in the road yet, though I guess we all do. It's strange to read this posting because my impression of you is, of course, entirely separate from the parts of your identity that are 'wife', 'mother', 'feeling rather middle-aged'. What I see is simply the spark of your consciousness in the context of Internet: intelligent, sharp, funny, well-read, interesting. How on earth could a spark of that sort be diminishing in any way?
We are our sparks, in my view. Not the clumsy bodies we have to lug around with us, which you spend your career patching and repairing. Not our houses and children and cars and mortgages. So think of it this way: your spark is out there lighting little fires all over the Internet.
Fuck passing the baton, if you will pardon my French. Be the bloody firestarter that you are, and damn the torpedos.
life's a bitch, and then you die.
but you don't die if you're not a female dog
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